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Showing posts from June, 2017

To All the Heartless Moms Out There

Find me now atLucid Renewal
Two ideals of myself met themselves on the highway during a downpour with no one else around to see, and that was kind of the point. The two of us seldom meet: the loving, selfless mother and the 21st century Queen of Generation Me. I don’t really like for anyone else to know the latter exists, so the lack of acquaintance between these two versions of me is by design. As I drove away and the distance between us grew, a brief rising ball of tears caught in my throat, but nothing followed. It would remain that way, no hysterics, no crying. The cold, calculating version won out—again.

I left two little boys for a month away from their mother, away from me, and drove away with no sobs.

I didn’t post on Facebook about them being gone this time. I didn’t want to lie. The trouble is I enjoy the break, and saying, “Oh, I can’t stand to leave them” is so fake that . . . well, I just left it out this time. We cold-hearted mothers aren’t supposed to say this aloud. We…

What I Think About

Find me now atLucid Renewal
I am a traditionalist. And, by that, I mean a Leftist's worst nightmare. On the other hand, I am most absolutely not the Republican kind; I haven't voted either Democrat or Republican in at least three presidential election cycles. Both parties make my stomach turn.
I am a Christian, I am divorced, and I am a mom. I am aware of the contradictions and sins in all of that. I am also, and of course, a pariah. I collect my earned income credit during every tax season.
I walk a tightrope, and I truly believe that everyone, including myself, is so enamored by the Modern Project that we have truly lost our minds.
I am somewhere between a former member of the privileged white, educated middle class and a part of the “deplorables” that many like to analyze but for whom not many actually care about when it is all said and done.  I am a public school teacher in a rural community who believes that compulsory education is one of the roots of all evil.
I am a for…